Carnal world vs. Universe. How about you back off concrete reality?

Find me a spider web so I could show you the gates of tomorrow.
Behind ourselves a sea of nothingness awaits, but why don't we step further? ... Where does the wave wash over?... Over you? How about we wind our way to him! So many times have we seen the mirror image of the sky in the water and now we can't face the infinite?

If the Universe has no sense, do any of us have? We ignore the general, but protest when being an exception. Banality vs. passion? The Universe has no sense, each of us finds it one , says Emil Cioran.
Truth is we run away from banality like Icarus from the Sun - in the end we get burned.
Banality and infinity are pretty similar - none understood, both resented, though only one catches us as we breathe. We are imprisoned into a banal reality because we are not aware of any real power. Infinity is talked about in such an objective manor - not understood, though ever so fascinating! To think of something without beginning or end...it's just as thinking of, well, nothing.
We're drowning, yes. In reality, everything becomes redundant (well, you make it that way, don't look at me). The difference between banality and infinity is that banality manifests in a measured time, which flows like a violent waterfall, though seen by us like a calm stream. A lot of people don't know how to exteriorize themselves, even though they see pictures of fabulous art, sounds so profound in their simplicity, have no idea how electricity works, though they know that you could cook a man's dinner with it, and you can, well, also cook the fag. So what do we really know about the existential nucleus in which we gather? Bars embrace our mind, transfiguration is on the path of despair.
Creatures we are? We've been created to read others that claim to be creators, when we all are as such. Nietzche got that one right in Thus Spoke Zarathustra : "You creators, you powerful men!", and so introducing the perspective of us creating ourselves and our own universe as we go along. (Churchill kind of copied that...douchebag)
Anyway, the idea of "finding oneself" is so misleading and thus misleaded - it gives the false impression that one has some sort of self-waiting to be ferreted out, when in reality, the self has to be MADE.
There's no blackboard in the sky that says that I, Green Beans, age 99, born on Pluto will have discovered panacea and thus bring peace to mankind and also get lung cancer from smoking too much and die on my birthday.
No, I create myself, I determine my future, for future is a mere illusion, it's just an excuse to get away from "now". People rarely can create their own selves because society and environment takes that place instead, so well, great masses think alike and absorb even greater masses and so ... drowned the sheep in the sea. Well I'm the black sheep and I tell you - don't fucking do it!

That Time

This crave of gold raised a claw of silver

Upon its might, the Sun creeps in

Comes forth a gentle spring with fruited beards under the boughs

Now comes the time, when that time never comes

Now is not tomorrow morning anymore,

But a decaying part of what has been.

Evermore ugly is that brightly colored dress

Of smiles made of salt , from the earth beneath

Glowing in sparks, yet fake,

Wrapped around these leaves like the auras of saints.

Crashing down and out the door

A swallow stole the key to the garden of gold

In the shadow of the red rusty oak

She made quite an appearance

Evermore ugly is that dress of caterpillars

A fire inside washed over by wet arrows

Wind touch, petals kept falling in the well

As Autumn came and in love you fell.

Jeluită-mi toropeală...

M-am înciudat de propriile simţuri. M-am înciudat de goliciunea acum ceva plăcut, un sentiment de admiraţie întârziată spre o frecvenţă familiară. Cu alte cuvinte, m-am înecat la malul mării în călătoria mea strofocantă spre împlinirea eului, revolta mea împotriva originii, indentitatea robotică, pe a cărei frunte putrezit atârnă sângele unor eroi; am un lup cu coadă înflăcărată în frunte - port genele unor luciferi ce şi-au pierdut adevărata indentiate. Simţurile spontane mi-au dărâmat zidurile şi singura reacţie e o stare inertă, legumiformă. Depinde de mine să dau comanda, dar scandalul meu ideologic a devenit miop. Mi-am trimis nervii la război nerăbdătoare să îi secătuiesc. Să ardă până la capăt!

Jeluită-mi nebunie

Am un simţ etern familiar că flutură un strat ireal de existenţă pe lângă noi. Presimţeam cumva că această irealitatate este atât de lipsită de ţintă încât o pot fasona după cum arde în mine gândul jeluit sau nejeluit. Şi deşi înţeleg printr-o telepatie surdă cu universul mesaje de o frecvenţă stupid de ameţită în fiinţă, de ce simt că e o doar o gafă oţelită a propriei minţi? E ispita de a exista. Eterna bolnăviciune a duratei, care fără efort energetic ne înlănţuie în revolta inimii faţă de raţional. Aşa ajunge lupul să cadă toropit la picioarele mielului.

Ce sinapsă blestemată ne blochează impulsul animalic?

Omul din mine e însetat, vrea să ştie ce şi de ce, dar totuşi ceva îmi suflă în cap şi găsesc că nu vreau să ştiu; am ajuns să înţeleg - nu, să observ - că puterile biruie când existenţa lor este acceptată fără întrebări ascuţit de adânci. Când sapi în ciment nu primeşti decât o lopată-n gură. Am ajuns să înţeleg că mai uşor limpezesc o nebunie cu regula de trei simplă decât cu microscopul.

Drama vieţii se joacă în numai două minute.

Das Erste Sonett

This is a rough interpretation of The First Sonet by Bertolt Brecht

As we broke up once into YOU and ME
And our beds stood HERE and THERE
We appointed an ever so simple word
That should have been : I touch you

It seems : this joy of our chats has become poor
That the touch itself is irreplaceable
Although at least were “they” so harmless
And kept safe like a forbidden thing

Remained appropriate and were though withdrawn
Wasn’t for the need, though was free
Wasn’t really there, but at least it wasn’t far away

And when we found ourselves
surrounded by unknown people
We used this word without a care
And already knew: we were swaying.

Original Text:

Als wir zerfielen einst in DU und ICH
Und unsere Betten standen HIER und DORT
Ernannten wir ein unauffälig Wort
Das sollte heißen : ich berühre dich.
Er scheint: solch Redens Freude sei gering
Denn das Berühren selbst ist unersetzlich
Doch wenigstens wurd >>sie<< so unverletzlich
Und aufgespart wie ein gepfändet Ding.

Blieb zugeeignet und wurd doch entzogen
War nicht zu brauchen und war doch vorhanden
War wohl nicht da, doch wenigstens nicht fort

Und wenn um uns die fremden Leute standen
Gebrauchten wir geläufig dieses Wort
Und wußten gleich: wir waren uns gewogen.

Flaming Bird Icarus (Flight Of Icarus)

You can gaze at the horizon hostilely,
but the Sun might gaze spitefully to you.
To think how a glimpse of his tails,
So perfervid
Could strike the clueless alate
Crash them seamlessly to the ashes of their graves.
To think that the Sun is there while we are here
and we seem to want to be closer, though cooler by second
Banish me from your filthy glasses of wine!
Banish me from these damped spaces
that felt no bear-footed shine!
Discard me from my right as human
To breathe your air and know true love!
To drink your waters and riddle your mazes!
From the shipwreck of the virgin hatches your flood

"So in this immensity my thinking drowns"
Said the mad man as the wave washed him over
"So in the name of God my father I'll fly!"
Said Icarus as he dived off the cliffs of Dover
His eyes wet of pride, the thirst of a pewit
Yearning for the gaze of the eagle
And as the horns break, blood of the bull on her dress
"In the name of Ariadne I'll die!"

The night flutters in, owls wailing for heaven in hell
But as the great bough of the Sequoia tilted
And the wild cats flew off its leaves
And the roots of the fern trees withered
There is the Sun cremating the wings of a dream
There floats the flaming bird Icarus
As high as the Sun, a spiteful look is what he gave
So the Falcon God played as the deuce
And the bird turned into ashes and into its grave.

(Inspired by "Flight of Icarus" from Iron Maiden)

A Dormant Panacea In The Vitriolic Insignificant

A dormant panacea in the vitriolic insignificant.

This is only a rough inrush of my vista on what one calls 'life's curious ways of being'. I see Panacea as the mere breath of every being, alive or soulless; the 'cure-all', as it is regarded, is not necessarily a supernatural light that eventually casts our miseries away and embraces our existence with arms wide open, some sort of magical salvation - NO.

Panacea is everything that surrounds us; whether one chooses to perceives it or not. It still is there, in our very breath, in a rock struck over and over by the violent flow of the stream, vibrating in our synapses and well, making everything have the ability and quality to BE.

This flow of energy (for energy is what animates and creates) has built in such a way that solid high frequency vibrations, so I call it, are what determines us to think and react. What we can't perceive is what separates us from it. A rough, yet precise term is given to us from physics, the so called electromagnetic spectrum, wherefore this spectrum is the barrier between what we are able to see, perceive and understand, and everything else : anomalies, miracles, unordinary manifestation of nature, alternate dimensions and what's more to that, that is far beyond our sight and imagination, the space, in which there is the vid. We cannot understand the vid, because we are never surrounded by "nothing", there's always something there. In which case, comes space, vid, and other forms of being that emit much stronger radiations, whereas we, on our little planet, in our little Milky Way, are surrounded by a lot of explainable phenomena, that is materialized for that matter.

So, my point is that, as little and seemingly "helpless" and powerless creatures we might be, we have something that yet again, we can't perceive. Some do, but most don't. It's a flow of energy in us that determines a lot of "unexplainable phenomena" for the vid, for space, for what's beyond, in that we are beings that can FEEL, that think, operate, we are ACTIVE forms of being; evanescent gift nevertheless. In any case, the comparison between high energy and power in the universe, nebulas, huge stars, flow of plasma and so on and so fort and real chemical reactions that directly determine the other physical phenomena going on inside a rational being's head etc, etc. We have the ability to use these energies and activities and that's what makes us unique in the Universe, we are the opposite of nothingness and meaninglessness, though one may say that simply living is an act of meaninglessness.

I'd say - start being thankful for your power that you can develop if you accept to perceive it. Otherwise, you're welcome to deny it but you're still using it, whether consciously or unconsciously.

Andro Metamorphose

I've translated this song a while ago and I thought I should show it to the world, as it's a great image of love opposed to the universe, like the sun and moon combining. You can also find their video on YouTube where I had uploaded it : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNUR-7LZy8A

Listen to it and then think a little about the night sky, look at the stars and ask yourself a question you've never tried to answer before.

Andro Metamorphose　　　　　by　Plastic Tree

アンドロ　メタモルフォゼ

Taionkei.

体温計

Thermometer

Akai mono.

赤い物

Red things.
Joushoushiteku boku no netsu.

上昇してく僕の熱

My rising temperature

Kokoronara,

心なら

If it’s the heart
Metamorufoze.

メタモルフォゼ

Metamorphose
Kaketeku kimi no fun.

かけてく君の分

It’s your time

Izure Inochi, moetekimasu.

いずれ命燃えてきます

One life to be burnt
Hai ni nari, suna ni nari.

灰になり　砂になり

Turning into ashes, turning into sand
Sorenaraba, saisho de saigo,

それならば最小で最後

Be it like that, the shortest and last

Bokuraga deaeta koto.

僕らが出会えたこと

Of our encounter

Na wo yonde, na wo tsugete.

名を呼んで　名を告げて

Calling your name, putting names
Toumei janai boku ni shite,

透明じゃない僕にして

Coming to me who isn’t pure

Tabekake no tsuki ga boku wo tsumetaku niranderu.

食べかけの月が僕を冷たくにらんでる

The swallowed moon is staring at us coldly.
Miraimade, issho ni sa, iketara yokatta na?

未来まで一緒にさ、行けたらよかったな？

If we could walk together in the future, it would be perfect, wouldn’t it?
Shiteagetai dekinai koto ga, takusan arundayo.

してあげたいできないことが、たくさんあるんだよ

There a lot of things that I want to give you and I can’t.

Yumenarane, samenaide, ikuoku no yoru wo koe.

夢ならね、覚めないで、行くおくのよるを声

Be it a dream, going further with your voice without waking up
Ginga ni ne, kakomarete, meguri au no wanda warudo.

銀河にね、囲まれて、巡り合うのワンダワルド

Being sorrounded by The Milky Way, encountering a wonder world
Donani ne, kurakutemo, sugu ni mitsuke daseru yo.

どんなにね、暗くても、すぐに見つけ出せるよ

However it may be, even if it gets dark, I’ll find you soon
Kioku no ne, ito tadori, kitto soko ni ikuyo.
記憶のね、糸辿り、きっとそこに行くよ

And the memories, following the threads, I’ll deffinetly go there (after them)

Okubyou ni naru, mahoutsukai.

臆病になる、魔法使い

I turn timid, using magic

Ai no jumon,

愛の呪文

The spell of love
Rifurein.

リフレイン

Rephrain
Mune ni yadosu hana nara zenbu, kusattete, mugoi iro.

胸に宿す花なら全部、腐ってて、むごい色

If it’s all the flowers that I keep in my chest, they rot into cruel colors.
Kurushikute, ureshikute, setsunakute, koishikute.

苦しくて、嬉しくて、切なくて、恋しくて

Painfully, happily, hurting, beloved
Konnani ne, saiteru no ni, hitotsumo agerenai.

こんなにね、咲いてるのに、ひとつもあげれない

In this case, though they bloom, I can’t give you any

Yume de mo ne, kienaide, ikuokume yoru nano?

夢でもね、消えないで行くおく目よるなの？

Be it even a dream., would my eyes go further without disappearing?
Ginga ni ne, usumorete, hagureteshimau wanda warudo.

銀河にね、うすもれて、逸れてしまうワンダワルド

Light leak in the Milky Way, the wonder world going astray
Tsuki kara ne, fuku kaze de, namida mo itsuka kawaite,

月からね、吹く風で、涙もいつか乾いて

The blowing wind from the moon will one day dry our tears
Soshitara ne, dokomademo zutto aruitekesou.

そしたらね、どこまでもずっと歩いて消そう

And when they do, let’s forever walk and disappear

The Dream Island

悪魔が来て唄いながら

望んでた世界はどうって　問いかけてくる

救いの手も、もうどうやら　つかめそうにない

僕の特技は独りぼっち

居場所なんかなかったって　答えてみた

とても綺麗な日、希望も灰になりそうな

夢から覚めるための呪文が思い出せないのは何故だろう？

That meaning :

A demon came to me singing

And asked me how I wanted the world to be like

Even a helping hand seemed useless

"My special skill is being by myself", I tried to say

Even an utterly beautiful day、even my hopes turned into ashes

Why can't I remember the waking up from the dream spell?

This is a part of one of my favorite songs, "Yume no shima" by Plastic Tree.

As in the many legends, there's always a higher force that gets interested in human nature, in how we perceive life and feelings, in the effort of seeing the world through a human's eye - hence, the demon , that actually reminds me of the Faustian story.

Anyhow, the human doesn't want to imagine exactly how to change the world, he also ignores any kind of help, be it from a higher force or not. He simply answers that what he did best was being by himself. So, come to think of it, humans are built to communicate, to share, to depend on one another, nonetheless, solitary people are still lingering around and their concept of an utopia isn't a wide shiny world, but more like a simple escape of the redundant feelings and reality, hence the following :

目に浮かんだ悲しみを捨てにどこに行こう？

きらきらした夢の島、どこにあるの？

燃えて消えないゴミたちと朽ちて生きたいよ

きらきらした夢の島、一緒に行こう, meaning :

Where should we go to cast away the flowing dreariness in our eyes?

The glaring dream island, where is it?

I want to decay along with the endlessly burning trash

The glaring dream island, let's go there together

So we all seek to get rid of negativity. It grows a lot on us, sometimes we even take it as a mode of being, BUT, rational beings as we are, we understand that being by yourself won't bring you peace. So, he seeks a limited space, if not a heavenly remote area like an island, wherein everything is as he wanted. All the dreariness inside has grown so big, that he feels that throwing away all his bad times and feelings in the fire, is almost like throwing away his very soul, since there aren't any other different emotions lingering abide. The feeling is complex and contradictory, but then comes the idea of the unity, the 2 in 1, the androgynous or however it is called - needing a nub of yourself reflecting in the pupils of someone else, so why not cast off the sorrow, and accept the gift we're given, the ability to change our state of mind in an instant. Once we are aware of our power of thought, (that creates), once we can imagine this in our "dream island", within, we'll see it without. People believe if they see, but they can't see if they don't believe. It's vice-versa.